One of my earliest memories of Monty is seeing him on TV during his participation in the 1984 winter olympics. It was the first time I'd ever laid eyes on a toboggan, and, judging by his performance, toboggans were new to Monty too. After a seemingly inevitable crash on the first bend, a gravely injured Monty was administered the kiss of life by a quick-thinking mountain rescue pony called Trixie, who, as we all now know, was a caring pony of the Shetland kind.
Monty's misinterpretation of Trixie's life-saving actions led to a tempestuous affair/ponynapping which lasted for the best part of a decade, only coming to an end when a joist in Monty's loft gave way. To this day, Monty's wife has never gotten over the shock of seeing her naked husband clinging to a startled pony, as it came crashing through the ceiling and proceeded to all but destroy her favorite coffee table.
With his marriage on the rocks and Trixie now very much at large, Monty threw himself into "pro-active" low-carbing, developing a keen interest in the written works of a certain Roger "keto-warrior" Jenkins. Inspired by my militant advocation of carbohydrate restriction, Monty launched an audacious petrol bomb attack on the Bromsgrove franchise of Pizza Hut, which led to a lengthy spell without eyebrows for the manager and a lengthy spell in prison for Monty.
Monty's misinterpretation of Trixie's life-saving actions led to a tempestuous affair/ponynapping which lasted for the best part of a decade, only coming to an end when a joist in Monty's loft gave way. To this day, Monty's wife has never gotten over the shock of seeing her naked husband clinging to a startled pony, as it came crashing through the ceiling and proceeded to all but destroy her favorite coffee table.
With his marriage on the rocks and Trixie now very much at large, Monty threw himself into "pro-active" low-carbing, developing a keen interest in the written works of a certain Roger "keto-warrior" Jenkins. Inspired by my militant advocation of carbohydrate restriction, Monty launched an audacious petrol bomb attack on the Bromsgrove franchise of Pizza Hut, which led to a lengthy spell without eyebrows for the manager and a lengthy spell in prison for Monty.
